Marriage: Feelings vs. Promise

Jason & I watched this little video recently of Tim Keller, John Piper, & Don Carson and there was so much good in it that I had to share it with you. Even if you wouldn’t call yourself a Christian or religious, I think you’d like this.





Sustaining the Covenant of Marital Love

My favorite things from the video (Watch it before you read my thoughts because they say it so much better than I do!):

  • “In your many years of marriage, have you ever considered divorce?” “Divorce? Never! Murder? Often!”
  • I found the concept that my husband will be married to at least 5 different versions of me over the course of our marriage to be so true! For better and for worse, I change. During my first year of motherhood, I was a very different person than the girl he married. I was very emotionally unsteady. I was physically exhausted. I felt spiritually abandoned and angry. I’m so glad he based our marriage at that time on his promise and not on his feelings!

What did you think?




3 responses to “Marriage: Feelings vs. Promise”

  1. I appreciate Tim Keller’s reference to Lewis Smedes’ article about being married to 5 different people over the course of a lifetime. I can imagine that some people feel that it’s even more than that! The concept encompasses all the changes that will happen over a lifetime, and they SHOULD happen in most circumstances.
    I recently heard a young woman say about her ex-husband, “He just wasn’t who I thought he was.” I thought, “Welcome to the club…and, I’ll bet he feels the same way about you!”
    In the end, it interests me to read Lewis Smedes.

    1. I totally agree; that’s a great thought. There are a lot of days when I’m not who I thought I was! And, when it comes right down to it, I honestly hope to change continually to be a better wife, mom, friend, person, so that ideally my husband will be married to a large variety of [better and better] “me”s by the time death does us part.

  2. This was really insightful and encouraging, Joce. thanks for sharing!